Places like Martone's hometown of Fort Wayne, as well as Peru, Elkhart, and Indianapolis, and narrators such as Colonel Sanders, Alfred Kinsey, and James Dean's high school English teacher all come to life with the author's trademark blend of irreverent humor and incisive reality.

Table of Contents
Preface
1. From Alive and Dead in Indiana
Highlights
Everybody Watching and the Time Passing Like That
Pieces
Alfred Kinsey, Along After and Interview, Dreams of Indiana
Whistler's Father
Dear John,
The Greek Letter in the Bed
Schliemann in Indianapolis
Biograph
2. From Safety Patrol
King of Safety
Nein
Lost
Parting
The Third Day of Trials
Watch Out
An Accident
A Short, Short Story Complete on These Two Pages
Carbonation
March of Dimes
X-ray
The Safety Patrol
3. From Fort Wayne Is Seventh on Hitler's List
Fort Wayne Is Seventh on Hitler's List
Three Postcards from Indiana
4. From Seeing Eye
The Mayor of the Sister City Talks to the Chamber of
Commerce in Klamath Falls, Oregon
Dish Night
Lice
Meat
What I See
The Teakwood Deck of the USS Indiana
Limited
Three Tales of the Sister City
Guam
The War That Never Ends
Chatty Cathy Falls into the Wrong Hands
Evaporation
Miners
The War of Northern Aggression
Elkhart, There, at the End of the World
Blue Hair
It's Time
Fidel
Seeing Eye
Outside Peru
Turning the Constellation
5. From Pensees: The Thoughts of Dan Quayle
On the Highway of Vice Presidents
On the State of the Union
On the Tomb of the Unknown Soldier
On Late-Night TV
On Anesthesia
On Barbie
On Hoosier Hysteria
On 911
On Quaylito
On The Little Prince
On The Planet of the Apes
On Snipe Hunting
6.Uncollected Fiction
Borges in Indiana
Species
7. Two More Things to Do When in Indiana
The World Headquarters of World Headquarteres
The Thirty-Year Salad Bar War
Three Contributor's Notes and a Review of Michael Martone
Contributor's Note
Contributor's Note
Contributor's Note
Review